Brothers 4 Change

I have responded to far too many instances of sexual violence in 30+ years of campus law enforcement where silence and acceptance of a high risk culture perpetuates violence against women (and men). Silence lends approval and the only way change can occur is to stand up, be heard and take action to make change.

In my past positions I empowered others by creating professional development and campus programming opportunities for awareness and education. I have been fortunate to direct a department where we could seek grants to train a law enforcement community and build bridges with other community services, and student organizations. Having been in the early stages of creating Sexual Assault Task Forces, Response Teams, and campus & community coalitions many opportunities evolved to break down barriers and make sexual assault an institutional issue while empowering people to take ownership of change.

"Endeavor to Persevere" — Chief Dan George

Jack Johnson — In Between Dreams

• The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker
• Sexual Aggression Information
• Indiana Campus Sexual Assault Prevention Project
• Indiana Coalition Against Sexual Assault, Inc.

The fact that I got HIV as a child, and then as an adult I realized that I could do my part to prevent others from having to live with the virus, while inspiring those who are already living with it.

I share my story, and use my sense of humor to do so. I think it really helps people to let their guards down, and by making them laugh it opens up a dialogue. I like to think that after hearing me speak, people not only want to learn more about HIV/AIDS, but think that I'd be a fun person to just hang out with.

"When life gives you AIDS, make lemon-AIDS!" —Sarah Silverman, though old-time AIDS activists say this originated back in the 80's.

Bella Morte and Depeche Mode, whom I met through the Make-A-Wish Foundation as a kid. Shamelessly, I also listen to my own music, Synthetic Division.

The best place to go, in my opinion, is Poz.com. There, you can read blogs by people living with HIV, and get the HIV/AIDS newsfeed with all the latest information about the worldwide epidemic.

I personally struggled with gender roles growing up male in a very conservative place and through my mother's and two friends' stories. With the help of two amazing mentors in college I came to see the tremendous amount of suffering that men cause in the lives of (themselves & other) men and women they love. By adhering to ideas of who and what men and women are that are harmful and archaic we all participate in oppression. I could not handle that idea and so I've chosen to work toward ending that oppression by challenging others (specifically men) to see human worth outside of the ability to fit in a box.

I start with challenging myself as often as possible to be a different kind of male person who doesn't necessarily fit into male stereotypes and to let this process be visible. While I am and do "manly" things, it begins to open a dialogue when I do or accept things traditional notions of manhood wouldn't. I have many formal and informal discussions with (primarily) students that often start with issues like consent and lead into deeper ones of shame, guilt, growing up male, identity, etc. Those "discussions" range from group conversations after a film, panel discussions, one on one personal interaction, fun events (rock climbing, backpacking) leadership development events (White Ribbon Campaign, Walk A Mile In Her Shoes, etc) with students, etc.

Tough since I have several!

"We aren't about judging men from wherever they are coming to this conversation -- lord knows it was only a few short weeks/months/years since any of us were sitting in very similar places -- really NOT wanting to hear whatever it is that "those feminists" have to say about these issues. And yet, here we are." —Rus Ervin Funk

I don't have one, but my current favorite is "My Enemies are Men Like Me" by Derek Webb... it helps remind me partly of how men are taught to see others, challenges me to envision a different manhood and helps remind me there are many that have no voice.

Our program's website is: www.plu.edu/~mav.